Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Marriage for all

Some recommended reading: Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert. She’s done all the research on marriage that you could wish for. Nothing is new:  The story of Mr and Mrs Loving, in their day mixed marriage caused a lot of trouble!

 Tomorrow the first ever gay couple in France will officially marry. This is at the end of several months of sometimes violent protest by the anti marriage for all movement. The movement has been led by Frigide Barjot (a play on the name of Brigitte Bardot), who in my opinion often shoots herself in the foot. She said that marriage is for a man and a woman who want to make babies. Does she mean that couples who do not want children, couples who cannot have children and couples who are too old to have children, cannot marry?

Then we get on to the subject of adoption. “A child needs a Mummy and a Daddy in order to thrive properly”. In France one child in 5 is being brought up by a single parent. How do they think lone parents feel when they hear that statement? What about parents whose partener just went off. “The responsibility of a family is too much for me” (We know someone who left their wife and two children with those parting words)? Not to mention the children who end up murdered or ill treated by their step-fathers? What about the wives of Soldiers recently killed in Afghanistan and Mali; what do they make of that statement?

As I see it, any idiot can make a baby – and they often do. I’ve worked with teenagers who were well aware that they were unwanted by their parents from an early age. Only highly committed couples get the opportunity to adopt the baby or child that they really want. Children need love from consistent adults in their lives to thrive.

 I wish Vincent and Bruno all the best in their future life. If they choose to adopt, I hope that they are treated with the same fairness that any heterosexual couple could expect.


Robert Smith said...

"unwanted by their parents from an early age". I know that feeling only too well. My parents didn't want me because I was the result of one night of passion at the local Palais de Dance.

In those days (1937)you had to get married, it was expected by society. My mother didn't bother much with me because she had to marry a man she didn't love, and my father had very little to do with me because he couldn't carry on womanising (I suspect he did though!)

I was given to my Grandparents to bring me up when I was about 7. It was there I discovered what it was to be loved.

Shirley Anne said...

Hi Anji. I am totally against same gender marriage and association because being a Christian I believe it goes against God's will. That aside, just because those who are married or who have divorced/separated get things wrong still doesn't mean it is right if two people of the same gender shack up together. They may indeed love each other but in God's eyes they do wrong if they follow the desires of their hearts. It is not a sin to be homosexual but it is to practice it. You may think I am foolish because you perhaps don't believe in God, I don't know but I believe that one day you will face Him. What excuse would you have for agreeing with sinful ways?

Shirley Anne

Anji said...

Keith: I'm glad you felt loved at some point in your childhood. My parents were both on the way when their parents married. I think that my parents were loved but I'm not sure how happy my Grandparents were.

Shirley Anne: Thank you for your comment. I've been thinking about how to respond. Yes I do believe in God. I don't know the Bible well, but I know enough to say that if you search you will always find the answer that you seek.

I believe that homosexuality was outlawed in ancient times because it was much less complicated for young men to keep male company. Women were not free to join in with hunting and sport; rules about menstruation were very strict. Let alone PMT and the fear of pregnancy. The elders could see that the race could die out so they did something about it. There are lots of other theories too.

Doris said...

Bravo Anji for being so bold. The sin in this world is the lack of compassion and understanding and being judgemental.

Anji said...

Doris: Thanks for your support